Preface

Men don't marry and women don't marry. If they fall in love with each other, they climb up the girl's window at night , make up at night and leave in the morning. They have no husband or father.

After the child is born, he is given to be raised by his mother and uncle . This is the Mosuo people in Yunnan , who are known as the real-life version of the Kingdom of Daughters.

So why did such customs form in the local area ?

01

This mysterious ethnic group lives next to Lugu Lake in Yunnan. After hearing about this custom , many people who travel to Yunnan become curious and want to find out more to see whether the local customs are really as rumored by the outside world.

A Mosuo girl named Lacuo opened a hotel next to Lugu Lake . After hearing that the owner was from the Mosuo ethnic group, many men had malicious intentions and wanted to strike up a conversation with her .

They heard about the custom of the Mosuo people, which is that as long as a man and a woman like each other , they have to exchange a token of love. At midnight, the man comes to the girl's window, shows the token he exchanged with her during the day, and then he can go in .

The man has to put down his hat outside to indicate that the girl is on a date with someone, and when the rooster crows , he can leave.

Even if the girl gets pregnant, he does not need to take responsibility. The girl will give birth to the child and then hand it over to her mother and uncle to raise. The child will take the mother's surname. When the child grows up, he only needs to tell him who the father is.

Moreover, when practicing walking marriage, one can have emotional exchanges with different girls and boys , and if one feels that the other party is to one's liking, then one can be together.

They sleep together at night and return to their own families during the day. If there is anything happening at the other's home, they can ask the other to help.

There is no such thing as who is whose wife or who is whose husband. If the other person does not meet your heart , you can just cut off all ties and never have any contact with him/her again.

Some people who come here to travel hear that this custom is so good and so free, so they want to hook up with Lacuo and have a romantic moment with her to make this an unforgettable night.

The Mosuo people believe in free love, but they are not willing to play around with men casually. Lacuo has received many confessions from men who want to have a walking marriage with her. Some of them were more polite in their language and not so explicit.

Lacuo could only taunt him a few times: "Why are you so confident in yourself ? Do you really think you are so charming that you can allow me to marry you?"

There were also some who said some very explicit and unpleasant words, and some even asked for money to let Chacuo sleep with the other person . Chacuo slapped him in the face without mercy.

Mosuo women are very strong and have to do all kinds of work outside the home . After Chacuo's slap, a red mark instantly appeared on the man's face. Lacuo is not can be easily bullied .

02

Lacuo’s second brother-in-law Chen Yongzhong is a young man of Han nationality . He met his second sister when they were working outside . His second sister told him about the local customs.

Chen Yongzhong came to the Mosuo people and they danced around the fire together at night. Then Chen Yongzhong gave his token to Chacuo's second sister. Chen Yongzhong was not allowed to enter through the main door of the girl's house at night.

You have to climb over the wall from the back door, and after the marriage, when the two people are in love and have confirmed their relationship , they can enter from the front door to meet each other's mother.

After Chen Yongzhong and Lacuo's second sister had their marriage, he wanted to go to Chacuo's mother to propose marriage and marry Chacuo's second sister to his own family.

But after hearing this , Lacuo's mother became very angry and said that there is no such thing as marrying off daughters here, and she would not marry her daughter to your family, as if she were selling her to your family .

After hearing the scolding from his mother-in-law, Chen Yongzhong realized that he was wrong and should respect their local customs , so he decided to marry into Lacuo's family.

When he first married into the Mosuo family, he didn't know how to do any farm work and was looked down upon by his mother-in-law's family . The rule of the Mosuo people is that whoever does more work will be respected.

After a period of time, Chen Yongzhong could do all kinds of work and won the respect of Lacuo's family . When Chacuo's elder sister was interviewed by the media, she said: "I have been married dozens of times. Whether it was when I was young or when I was old, it always gave her a sense of freshness.

"Every time we have a walking marriage , I feel like a newlywed . It feels really good and it helps the relationship between the two of us. It's like distance creates beauty.

"During the day, I can spend a warm and happy time with my family, and at night I can spend a sweet time with my lover ."

Lacuo's grandmother is over 80 years old . She has been married more than 50 times in her life and has given birth to children with different men. These children were raised by her brothers.

Being handsome is not considered an excellent quality among the Mosuo people , because at night it is so dark that you can't see the other person's face at all.

If you want to win the heart of a Mosuo girl, you must have a good voice and sing a beautiful folk song. Only when the song moves the Mosuo girl will she open the window for you.

The Mosuo people value girls over boys, and do not care about the gender of the child after it is born . Mosuo girls give birth to their children at home with their family members delivering them.

There is an old Mosuo man who is over 80 years old. When a reporter interviewed him, the old man said that he had practiced walking marriage more than a hundred times in his life, and his lovers were everywhere in the mountains.

Mosuo men do not have what the outside world calls the " virgin complex" . They only value the girl's inner heart and character.

The more capable and hardworking a girl is , the more popular she will be among the Mosuo people .

03

In the 1970s, the Mosuo people were influenced by the outside marriage concepts and established a monogamous system . However, after a period of implementation, more and more conflicts occurred between families formed by marriage and sexual relationships , and the Mosuo people felt that this system was becoming increasingly inconvenient.

Therefore, monogamy was abolished and the old rules of the Mosuo people were restored. In today's society, people say that marriage is like a grave, but Mosuo women do not have this concern. They look down on men very much, as long as they can get pregnant .

They don't need men to take responsibility because they can raise their children by themselves. What they fear most is the kind of man who sticks to them and forces them to marry him.

When encountering such a man, Mosuo girls will decisively abandon him. In their minds, love is only a small part of themselves, and family members are the most important part.

The Mosuo people do not care about the other party's family conditions. The Han people pay attention to the matching of family backgrounds, but even if the Mosuo people have a walking marriage with the other party, it has nothing to do with you whether the other party is rich or not. Even if the other party has no money, they do not need your support .

There was a Mosuo woman who married the most capable carpenter in the tribe and gave birth to two children . The woman loved the carpenter very much, but the carpenter said outside that he loved him so much because the clothes she made were so beautiful.

After hearing this, the woman immediately broke off her relationship with the man. She was very angry because the carpenter said that she was with him for material reasons.

A Mosuo woman who has left the mountains to work outside for four years also said that Han women always have many concerns about their sex life . They are afraid that the man will abandon them after they become pregnant, that the other party will be irresponsible, and that there will be rumors from the outside world.

But Mosuo women never have such psychological pressure, because after they become pregnant , their families will celebrate the birth of the child with great joy, and the family will raise the child together, so there is no need for men to raise the child.

Some people think that the Mosuo people's customs and habits are very advanced. They value girls more than boys , have basically no gender consciousness, and truly realize a society with equal rights.

Some people believe that this custom, without the concept of marriage , will cause confusion in ethical relationships and increase the risk of disease.

Conclusion

Many people have different opinions about this real-life version of the Kingdom of Daughters. Some people think it is a paradise, while others think it is immoral. What do you think?

References:

1. New Weekly: "Don't be silly, how can there be no men in the land of women"

2. The Paper: "The Walking Marriage System of the Mosuo People: The Future of Human Marriage?"

3. Minnan.com: "Pure Lugu Lake: Exploring the Magical Marriage Customs of the Mosuo People"

4. The Paper: "A study of the Mosuo people in Yunnan: Women live healthier lives in matriarchal communities"